In Memory of Dad — Notes of Hope and Change
Posted on 23. Oct, 2008 by Karen in Death and Dying, Family and Friends, Inspiration, Politics, Reflections
This week marks the 6th anniversary of my father’s death. Dad was a true Renaissance man — a dedicated physician, an accomplished artist, mentor to many and hero to me. He was the grandson of a slave and the slaveowner’s son and son of a domestic servant and a sharecropper turned factory worker. Despite his humble beginnings, Dad excelled in school because back then, that was the only way a young “colored” guy could remotely get ahead.
Dad injured his leg as a child and had to spend a year in a convalescent home. Despite this, he graduated near the top of his class from undergrad. Although he was positioned to go to medical school, back then they only took 2 Blacks in a class. So he waited for a spot for a year, earning his Master’s along the way.
In his senior year of med school, Dad’s leg was re-injured in the 1943 race riots in Detroit. Faced with another year in a convalescent home, he said “the hell with it” and let them amputate his leg at the knee. Despite THIS, he graduated first in his class — a fact he never knew until he retired 54 years later. The only thing we can figure is that it just wasn’t seemly to have a young Black man as valedictorian so grades weren’t posted the year he graduated.
Dad went on to a wonderful practice based more on service than on monetary gain. And as he grew his practice, he and my mother nurtured and grew 3 children — I was the oldest. Lest you think Dad was an egghead, that was just the tip of the iceberg of the man he was. He had a smile that was infectious, a million freckles, a sense of humor that had us laughing to the point of tears on many occasions. And so many people loved him for the caring and supportive way he showed up in the world — always.
As I grew older, Dad became my trusted advisor, my sounding board for what was supposed to be right in life. He was an amazing man who lived to be 83 years old. If he were here today and I were to tell him that a young Black man — another Renaissance man — was running for president of the United States, he would not be surprised. He always believed in the possibility that this country could rise above the heavy burden left by our history of racism. Because despite all, Dad was a man who believed in a world made better by hope and change.
I know he would have loved and been uplifted by the incredible music that has come out of this presidential campaign. So in search of a positive note this week (instead of too many tears), I found and posted here some of the music videos showcasing the talent and positive energy Dad would have admired and enjoyed. I hope you enjoy it too.
I love you Dad.
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11 Responses to “In Memory of Dad — Notes of Hope and Change”
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b
23. Oct, 2008
Loving remembrances.
How lucky you had Dad – and Dad had you…
…and the world benefits.
Karen
23. Oct, 2008
Thanks b. Always glad to know you stopped by.
Karen
charlotte
23. Oct, 2008
Nice very nice. Encourages me to treasure the moments with my Dad. He’s almost 75.
Madeleine Phillips
23. Oct, 2008
What a precious tribute to your Dad, albeit a brief one. Just the story of your parents alone would make a great book! What an impressive background and what a courageous man, and a sweetheart to boot! Thanks for sharing all that about him.
Madeleine
ByJane
23. Oct, 2008
Karen,
From one daddy’s girl to another…we are what we are because of our fathers, aren’t we?
Your father reminds me of the doctor who became my physician when I had the aneurysm. I trusted him above anyone else, and when he died a couple of years ago, I felt as if I had lost a parent. His name was William Young….
Jane
Laura
24. Oct, 2008
Thanks for sharing your remembrances of your father–spreading the memory. And thanks, too, for the songs.
Barbara
24. Oct, 2008
Karen, What a loving tribute to your dad– I lost mine over 7 years ago and I miss him, too. There are times when I so wish he were here to talk to me… I love how you’ve turned what could have been a sad week for you into looking at the positive musical aspects that have come out of the campaign to elect Barack Obama –I’m sure your dad would be proud that Barack has given the country so much hope and promise, but mainly that you have, too.
Warmly, Barbara
Celeste
25. Oct, 2008
Dear Karen:
What a wonderful tribute to your father. Chills as I read while holding back tears of my own. Thank you for sharing this with your readers. Karen, you are such an inspiration and just think your father has something to do with this beautiful characteristic of yours.
God bless.
Ann
28. Oct, 2008
Karen,
What a wonderful remembrance! My Dad passed away in 1972 and sometimes it still seems like yesterday.
Glad you are back and sounds like it was a great conference.
Hope to see you soon.
Ann
Karen Mulvahill
30. Oct, 2008
A beautiful and inspiring piece. Thanks, Karen.
Karen
30. Oct, 2008
Thanks everyone for your wonderful comments.
Charlotte, cherish each day that your dad is with you. Madeleine, yeah Dad was a sweetie and so funny!! And Jane, there’s nothing like being a Daddy’s girl, is there? Didn’t know you had such a serious health challenge! Every day is a blessing isn’t it? Laura, I’m glad you enjoyed the story and the music. Thanks Barbara for your feedback. It was a tough week but great for the memories–and the future. Celeste–I like to think I’m a lot like my dad. So your comment touches me. Ann–do we ever recover from the loss of our fathers? I don’t know. The conference was great and a great distraction. And Karen–thanks for reading and for your comment.
All of you made last week a little easier to get through. We get by with a little help from our friends…
Karen