Midlife’s A Trip

Antidote to An Unlived Life

Posted on 12. Jul, 2009 by Karen.

As I start my Sunday – first day of the week, day of new beginnings, I’m renewed by a wonderful passage from author and poet Dawna Markova:

“I will not die an unlived life.

I will not live in fear of falling or catching fire.

I choose to inhabit my days, to allow my living to open me,

To make me less afraid,

More accessible,

To loosen my heart until it becomes a wing, a torch, a promise.

I choose to risk my significance, to live so that which came to me as seed goes to the next as blossom,

And that which came to me as blossom,

Goes on to fruit.”

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Even More Karen’s Favorites from Britain’s Got Talent

Posted on 30. May, 2009 by Karen.

OK, now don’t say I didn’t warn you but this video will melt your heart as little UK songbird Hollie Steel gets a case of the nerves during her performance in the semi-finals. But surprisingly, she got a second chance from none other than tough as nails Simon! He really has a heart:-) She made a courageous comeback and then went on to the finals. Go Hollie!!

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Beyond Black Friday – Holiday Shopping for Seniors

Posted on 29. Nov, 2008 by Karen.

I didn’t go out on Black Friday this year but I remember the many times in the past when I did — running around looking for the latest greatest, must-have, got-to-get-it-now gift for someone on my holiday shopping list.  But not once do I recall a Black Friday that included racing around searching frantically for a gift for one of the elders in my family.  In fact, they never said “hey I have to have this, that or the other”.  They really didn’t ask for anything at all except to hear from me or, better yet, a nice visit.  According to the Eldercare Team, this is the best gift of all:

What’s a good gift for an elderly person who doesn’t need more “stuff” cluttering up the house?  December is the biggest gift-giving season, but all year long we’re faced with birthdays, anniversaries and other occasions when we have to find great gift ideas for seniors. The best gift for an elderly person is your time and attention:  time to talk, to listen, to do things together.

But if you’re like me and want to add a gift that seniors can touch and feel, think about approaching shopping from a different perspective to come up with something that’s appealing and useful – before the last minute.  Online shopping has helped me refine that process so I can find the gift that will bring a smile to my 89-year old mother’s face when she opens it on Christmas Day – despite her severe dementia. 

Caring.com has put together a well-thought out list with innovative gift ideas including a couple of my favorites – Life Bio, a journaling project to help a loved one in the early stages of Alzheimer’s preserve precious family memories and the Jitterbug, a cell phone easy for the non-techie senior (or anyone else for that matter) to understand and use.  To be honest, I’m not quite sure about the Pleo robotic dinosaur on this list as an alternative to a traditional pet, but you may just know the techie senior who’ll love this little fellow.  Whether you find what you’ll looking for or not, this list is a good starting point for inspiration.

As I wrote this article, I was reminded how quickly I’m moving down the path to senior hood.  So while the elders in my life tend to be in their 80s, the gift items and resources listed here are often appropriate for a variety of ages from the fifties on up.  While you’re online there are some interesting websites focused on this broad niche.  For instance, Gifts for Seniors and the Senior Emporium are like the supermarkets of great gift ideas.  And if you’re in the market for a luxury item, check out Elderluxe.  First Street Online is a good shopping venue for the elderly AND for those in midlife. 

For more specialized gifts, stop by Guardian Alert 911 and Life Alert for home alert systems for safety and to help preserve personal independence.  A big button memory phone or a day date clock are the new “must-haves”.  Also Landel, My Celery and Presto offer low-tech email options for the person who wants to stay in touch but not deal with a computer.

One of my recent favorite online sites is The Alzheimer’s Store where I’ve found a myriad of gifts and everyday necessities for the memory-challenged like my mother.  Unique offerings here include the wooden Handyman’s Box with its familiar feel and the life-like lavender-scented baby doll we bought earlier this year for Mom.  It still brings tears to my eyes as I remember the joy on her face as she took this “baby” into her arms for the first time. 

If you want to go the time-honored traditional route of giving sleepwear, I’ve found with my mother that L.L.Bean offers the best selection because they have petite sizes for women.  Check out the easy-care, easy-wear Zip Front Women’s Fleece Robe, the Men’s Fleece Robe and the Men’s Flannel PJs.

And for all of us who are feeling the budget crunch as we shop this holiday season, here’s a list  of 10 gifts for $50 and under for seniors:

1. Pick up a large print keyboard for those who are online but have some vision challenges.
2. Make a cozy polar fleece blanket with these easy photo directions – just scroll down the page.  My sister and I have made lots of these inexpensive gifts which go over really well in our cold Michigan weather.  This and any other crafts made with love are treasured and budget-conscious gifts.
3. The Life Bio Memory Journal mentioned is a project where you and your loved one can carve out precious time together as you preserve family memories.
4. For the senior who loves to garden, make time outside a little more comfortable with the Garden Hopper.
5. Big button phones get double mention in this article – they’re great!
6. The unisex Polar Fleece Lap Wrap/Shawl from Janska is a great gift for anyone.  I’ve been a Janska fan for years because everything is made out of polar fleece, very practical for people with limited mobility and just plain comfy for the rest of us. 
7. L.L.Bean’s Women’s Pima Cotton Flannel PJs – these fit women of all sizes very well, are comfortable and warm.
8. Cozy Men’s Fleece Scuffs for around the house.
9. Activity Lap Pillow - this is what I’m getting my mom for Christmas this year.  She needs something to fiddle with instead of her once busy hands lying idle.
10. Sentimental Sing-a-long DVDs are a great for a memory boost and a little fun. 

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Karen’s Back at the Keyboard

Posted on 27. Oct, 2008 by Karen.

Since last Thursday I’ve been in Baltimore attending the 2008 Coaching Super Summit with over 100 amazing coaches from all over the world and experts on everything from latest trends in Internet marketing to how to really get in touch with the pain of your target audience.  The speakers, many of whom may be resources for you in your business, included:

• Conference organizer and the coaching entrepreneur guru, Milana Leshinsky
• Michel Neray 
• Kendall SummerHawk
• Dan Janal
• Christian Mickelsen
• Beth Schneider
• James Malinchak
• Adam Urbanski
• Kevin Nations
• Tom Antion and
• Terri Levine

If you’re an entrepreneur or a solopreneur, any or all of these experts could help take your business to the next level.  So as you have time, check out their websites.

In the meantime, I’m glad to be back at the keyboard writing here at Midlife’s a Trip.  Our schedule was so jam-packed at the conference that there wasn’t time to blog.  But I really missed your friendship and readership so my apologies for being away so long. 

I’m baaaaaaaa-ck.

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Podcast with Author and Alzheimer’s Caregiver Mary Ellen Geist

Posted on 20. Oct, 2008 by Karen.

I’ve graduated from just blogging (well it’s never really “just”, is it) to my first podcast interview with author Mary Ellen Geist who left her successful career to come home to Michigan to take a new job as caregiver to her father, Woody who is a victim of Alzheimer’s.  Talking with Mary Ellen was like connecting with a soul sister.  We both have parents with dementia, both are from Michigan and both are in midlife. 

Hearing about Mary Ellen’s midlife transition — can we ever really call these things a crisis — was amazing especially since she decided to share her experience in her new book Measures of the Heart – A Father’s Alzheimer’s, A Daugher’s Return.  It a wonderful story that had me smiling in some chapters and crying in others.  I hope you’ll add this to your book list for a long winter’s night (at least here in Michigan). 

Do you have a special story to share about care-giving?

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Do You Feel Like Piggy Banking

Posted on 29. Sep, 2008 by Karen.

I don’t know about you but I can’t even watch the news these days without feeling anxiety over how the economy isn’t doing.  Last Thursday, I started watching the 1/2 hour of news I now allow myself each morning — it’s all I can stand.  The expert being interviewed on the economy stressed me out so that I had to cut my news allotment in half that day. 

Now lest you think I live in a cave, I’m on the computer all day getting those pop-ups on “breaking” and usually bad news from the New York Times.  And these days, the bad news seems to be about stocks, money and banks.  Do you feel like putting your money in a piggy bank these days?

Since there have been two major bank crises in the last week, you may be wondering how your bank is doing.  If you’re curious, check it out at Bank Rate where you get a detailed report on the condition of various financial institutions.  And it’s fair to start asking questions about whether your money is safe. 

It’s not time for panic but it is time for being as informed as possible.

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What Fresh Hell is This Award — Telemarketers

Posted on 16. Sep, 2008 by Karen.

Author Dorothy Parker, celebrated as the wittiest woman in America,  was known to get very peturbed when someone calling on the telephone would interrupt her as she sat writing.  Urban legend has it that her favorite retort to unwanted callers was:

What fresh hell is this?

Well lately I seem to be getting more than my fair share of unwanted call from telemarketers.  Luckily my caller ID alerts me to the easily identifiable telemarketer numbers.  But they are still an annoying interruption to just about anything I might be doing.  So why are telemarketers still calling me.

I can’t figure it out.  I could have sworn I registered my phone number on the Do Not Call List .  Lately it seems I must have registered on the “call me all the time” list.  So on the outside chance that my midlife brain got this wrong, I went back and registered — again — on the “don’t call me anymore or this time I’ll file a complaint on you” list. 

Apparently it will take a month or so for my request to take effect.  In the meantime, if you didn’t register way back when and you’re being bothered by telemarketers on your home phone, cell phone or email, register now.  It takes less than a minute to fill out the form and submit it.  Then you have to click on the email links the government sends you to make it official.  Then the telemarketers leave you alone like you have the plague — or so that’s how it’s supposed to go.

I’ll keep you posted.

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My Top 10 Daily Stops in Cyberspace

Posted on 10. Sep, 2008 by Karen.

As a blogger, I hang out in cyberspace quite a bit.  And there are times when it’s like trying to take a journey around the world in only 1 day!!  There’s so much to see. 

So I’ve created a roadmap that helps me not jump all over the map.  Here’s my top 10 daily stops:

1. The New York Times online.  I also get the breaking news alerts.  What better way to stay on top of what’s happening close to home and around the world.
2. Living Life Out Loud with my friend Michael.  Great advice and wisdom from a gay man who describes himself as a straight girl’s best friend.  He’s right!
3. Women Bloom where friend Allison posts so much info it’s no wonder that her site is a popular “go to” resource for midlife women.
4. The Boomer Chronicles where Rhea writes about all things midlife and has a kick-ass blogroll.  Don’t miss her on Friday when she shares links to even more places to visit in the blogosphere.  And btw — Boomer Chronicles was my very first stop out here as a blogger.
5. Midlifebloggers started this year by Jane is already the latest hang-out for women of a “certain age” who aren’t afraid to tell it like it is.  Jane hosts a ongoing “pot-luck” where women stop by with an article or an inspiring comment.
6. Blogher, the hub for women bloggers world-wide who post info and commentary on virtually any topic you can think of and where I write as contributing editor.
7. Viral Video Chart where all you can find all the latest videos “sweeping like wildfire” across the Internet.
8. Facebook where I’ve made my first baby steps into social networking.
9. My latest discovery, Alltop which Dan Roan, author of Back of the Napkin: Solving Problems with Pictures, describes with a great one picture worth a thousand words.  Check out my new Alltop “Confirmation that I kick ass” banner on the Midlife’s A Trip sidebar.
10. And of course, my home base right here at Midlife’s A Trip where I stop by everyday to post or read the great comments you leave.

 So where do you hang out — out here?

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A Place Called Happy

Posted on 03. Jun, 2008 by Karen.

Pulitzer Prize award-winning author, philosopher and philanthropist Edith Wharton once said:

“If only we’d stop trying to be happy we could have a pretty good time.”

If Wharton were alive today, she’d be thinking that we missed her point completely.  Recently I was in Border’s Bookstore and somehow wound my way around to the area where there were dozens of books on the topic of happiness.  Although I wasn’t looking for a book on happiness at the time, it made me wonder how an entire genre of writing and even psychology has grown up around the question “are you happy?” 

One of the well-known resources is psychologist Ed Diener’s “Satisfaction with Life Scale” that allows you to get a quick snapshot of whether you’re happy or not.  If you’re up to the challenge, here’s Dr. Diener’s test.  Using a 1-7 scale, pick the number that corresponds with your feeling and put it next to each of the 5 statements.

1=Strongly Disagree

2=Disagree

3=Slightly Disagree

4=Neither Agree or Disagree

5=Slightly Agree

6=Agree

7=Strongly Agree

 

—-1. In most ways my life is close to my ideal.

—-2. The conditions of my life are excellent.

—-3. I am satisfied with life.

—-4. So far I have gotten the important things I want in life.

—-5. If I could live my life over, I would change almost nothing.

Well I guess by now, you’re either happier than you thought or thinking that you may have missed the happiness boat altogether.  If the latter is how you’re feeling then you might be interested in learning more about how to be happy in a great video from the Doc Zone on Canadian television.  The video is about 40 minutes long so bring popcorn.

As for me, I now think of happiness as a journey not a destination.  For that reason, I’ve adopted the Edith Wharton strategy of just having a pretty good time in life.  And go figure — I’m happier.

How about you? 

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Presto! How to Email a Non-Techie

Posted on 30. Apr, 2008 by Karen.

How many of you have parents or grandparents who just don’t, won’t or can’t learn the computer technology needed to connect them to email? Well HP, the tech giant has solved the problem with creation of the HP Printing Mailbox. It works with a service called Presto and allows you to send email, documents and photos from your camera and cellphone to a loved one who doesn’t do email.

Whatever you send comes out of the HP Mailbox at a scheduled time in a single sheet ready for the recipient to pick-up and read. Here’s a recent testimonial:

It is a remarkable product that lets anyone receive email and attached photos, or PDF documents without the hassle and expense of a computer or Internet connection. It’s easy to set up and simple to use. All you need is an existing phone line and electrical outlet. Now our whole family can send Mom email and photos that are transformed into beautiful, full-color printouts. Messages are printed automatically, so all she has to do is pick them up off of the Printing Mailbox, read and enjoy!

It sounds so user-friendly I almost want one myself. You can even subscribe to a variety of magazine articles at no extra charge that will be delivered at the specified time you program into the mailbox. And there’s not a lot of maintenance involved beyond the periodic ink cartridge and paper.

This could be a great gift for seniors or anyone else who’s a non-techie that you want to stay in touch with. The mailbox itself is around $150 and the Presto service about $10/month. Although this isn’t cheap, it’s a thoughtful gift from a tech-savvy family to a loved one. And consider that as Mother’s and Father’s Days roll around, this might be the gift the whole family can chip in on to bring a smile every day to the non-techie they love.

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What You Don’t Know About Alzheimer’s Disease

Posted on 08. Apr, 2008 by Karen.

For years what I knew about Alzheimer’s could fit on the head of a pin.  I didn’t really understand how this disease ravages a brain.  I even remember joking about Alzheimer’s and using the phrase “a little touch of Al” to describe a moment of forgetfulness.  But now with a mother and best friend afflicted with this dreadful degenerative disease, there’s little room to be flip and uninformed.   

I found that you don’t know what you don’t know about Alzheimer’s until you know.  The New York Times article on the symptoms, diagnosis and treatment of Alzheimer’s Disease is one of the best resources I’ve seen recently that can provide a baseline of knowledge about the disease.  Please read this article if you know someone afflicted with Alzheimer’s — or even if you don’t.  You may learn something that will help someone down the road.  And because the incidence of Alzheimer’s will continue to increase as we 78 million Baby Boomers age, that someone just might be you.   

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Just Flip It!

Posted on 31. Mar, 2008 by Karen.

I’m the person who hates to read instruction manuals.  Car manuals, camera manuals, appliance manuals–I hate them all.  I want what I buy to be so intuitive that I can just start using it without any learning curve.  Unreasonable? 

Well the people at Pure Digital didn’t think so when they invented the handy little Flip camcorder I bought this weekend.  The Flip, appealing at less than $130, brings “point and shoot” ease to taking and making your own videos.  For the fashion conscious it comes in white, pink, orange, lime and black.

I’ve dreamed about taking videos of my 4 year old niece twirling around singing “twinkle, twinkle” but haven’t been brave enough to tackle the technology of a camcorder.  Now with the Flip–here I come.

So give me a day or so to play around with this camera that’s only slightly bigger than my cellphone and I promise you a video here on Midlife’s A Trip before week’s end. 

Say “cheese”! 

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The Boomer Consumer

Posted on 25. Mar, 2008 by Karen.

Tomorrow is the Boomer Business Summit in Washington, D.C. where those of us interested in what moves Baby Boomers come together to share, learn and be inspired.  So what exactly is a Baby Boomer?  

The best definition I’ve read is in Boomer Consumer, a new book I’ve been reading by Matt Thornhill and John Martin, co-founders of the Boomer Project.  According to Thornhill and Martin: 

[N]ine months after August 15, 1945, VJ day, the Baby Boom began.  Starting in early 1946 and over the next 19 years, the typical American woman had four babies, with the Boom peaking in 1957-58 when a new baby arrived every eight seconds.  For those keeping track, the birth rate dropped in 1965, signaling the end of the “Boom”. 

In other words, if you were born between 1945 and 1964, you are officially a Boomer.  To understand more about why we Boomers are the way we are, check out this book with its wealth of info on the most unique generation in history. 

Well, maybe I’m just a little biased.

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