4 Steps to a Happy New Year
December 30, 2007
As we head into 2008, there’s a great ritual that will help you get rid of this year’s baggage. It’s called the “burning bowl”. Here’s what you need:
- Small sheets of paper
- A pen
- A fireproof bowl or a fireplace.
Step 1
On the small sheets of paper, write down all the things from 2007 that you want to leave behind. Who or what was a roadblock to your progress? What opportunities did you miss? What opportunities should you have left alone? What made you sad? What made you mad? Just write down everything you can think of.
For instance, I’ve written down the following things to leave behind:
- An impossible relationship.
- Practicing law.
- Worrying about what other people think.
- Fear about anything (remember fear is just false evidence appearing real).
- Writer’s block
Step 2
Fold the sheets of paper and put them into the fireproof bowl and go to a place outside. If you don’t want to brave the elements in a cold climate, light up the fireplace. (Whatever you do, do it safely).
Step 3
Light a match and put it in the bowl (or put the pieces of paper into your fireplace). Watch the paper burn and the smoke waft away. Imagine your problems going up with the smoke.
Step 4
Repeat this affirmation as you use the burning bowl ceremony to let go of what didn’t work in 2007 and clear space for the year to come:
2008 is my year for prosperity and happiness.
Roquamole–The New Friendship Food
December 29, 2007
For Christmas I bought myself Nigella Express, the new cookbook by food diva Nigella Lawson. As I sat one evening reading and savoring the recipes, I came across one that demanded immediate attention. It’s called Roquamole.
Roquamole is this incredible creative blend of avocado and Roquefort cheese. If each of these two foods appeal to you individually, then you’ll love this dish. Just mix together these ingredients and serve with blue corn tortilla chips:
1 cup crumbled Roquefort
1/4 cup sour cream
2 ripe avocados mashed
1/4 cup sliced pickled green jalapenos coarsely chopped
2 T finely sliced scallions
1/4 t paprika
Now the only problem I found with this dish was getting it out of my kitchen. I warn you that tasting is dangerous because you won’t be able to stop. But if you heed my warning, then you can share it with a friend, which is exactly what I did.
Joyce, my best friend of fifty years, was in town for the holidays. We got together on a cold winter afternoon this week and shared old stories, Rocquamole and a great bottle of Chateau Peyre-Lebade. It was one of the best times I had this holiday season. Thanks Nigella for giving me a great new friendship dish. This is a keeper.
Christmas Dinner–A Bittersweet Meal
December 26, 2007
I had Christmas dinner with a very special family. It was their first Christmas without their adored Leah– wife, mother, daughter, cousin, daughter-in-law and friend. Leah died of cancer in May. She was only 41 years old and left her dear husband, Stephan and beautiful 3 year old son Zion behind.
A host of family and friends gathered to share Christmas dinner with Stephan and Zion. There was great food, laughter and good cheer. But there was also the pall of sadness as Stephan led grace and made note of Leah’s absence. Of course we all felt it and Stephan’s sadness. It made me especially grateful for my family who are still with me.
As we circled around this special family at this bittersweet dinner and celebrated the birth of Christ and the passing of Leah, I too remembered loved ones who are gone–Dad, Grandma, Aunt Mary, Uncle Willie, Uncle Scotty and Margaret. And as we celebrate this holiday season, know that you are always in my heart.
Merry Christmas to you. Merry Christmas to everyone.
Mom, Dementia and Me; The Power of the Purse
December 17, 2007
I went to visit my mom today in the memory care facility where she lives due to her dementia. It’s always interesting to me that the ladies in the facility always walk the halls with their purses. Most of them are very elderly and have severe dementia like Mom. But the one thing they remember is that they’re supposed to carry a purse. And so they do.
It seems that the ravages of the disease can’t wipe the imprint of years of carrying a purse. Now from time to time, the ladies lose their purses or end up with someone else’s. And sometimes there’s nothing in their purses but Kleenex and a piece of bread from the sandwich at lunch. But dementia or not–the purse remains a sacred accessory.
So today Mom had her purse on her arm as we walked around the halls–one of her favorite activities. As we strolled along I realized I had my purse with me too. I had to laugh because this was a snapshot of my future. Me thirty years from now still carrying my purse, still recognizing the power of this sacred accessory no matter what the state of my memory.
Do you feel the power of the purse?
My Son’s Wedding Anniversary
December 14, 2007
Today is my son’s Chip’s 6th wedding anniversary. He and my lovely daughter-in-law Kim were college sweethearts. But can it really be six years since they tied the knot in Las Vegas? They had planned a wedding back at home but a family illness necessitated a delay. So they started making other plans.
When my son told me that they planned to elope to Vegas, I told him what a wonderful idea. Chip was a little taken aback when I said I was eloping with them. But he didn’t really put up a fuss when I explained that there was no way I was missing the wedding of my only child. Kim’s father decided to join the wedding party too and we all headed out to Vegas to the Little White Wedding Chapel for the ceremony.
It was pouring rain as we left the hotel for the chapel. But you should have heard the oohs and ahs as people commented on what a beautiful couple. And indeed they were. During the ceremony, I stood there as my only child got married. I had a smile on my face, tears in my eyes and love in my heart. I remember thinking of my son as the curly-headed little toddler he once was–smiling his amazing and ever-present big grin. And I watched him smile it that rainy day in Vegas as he married the girl of his dreams.
Now six years later, my son and daughter-in-law have had all the ups and downs that young couples have. But their relationship is strong and today they celebrate that. And I do too. Chip and Kim–I’m wishing you much love and happiness today and in the years to come.
P.S. And there’s no pressure from me on the issue of grandchildren :-)
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Karen - Midlife Coach
